TWIC - Greatness

Redefining futility for future generations, it rained again on the weekend but the Coves continued to attempt cricket.  1s and 2s were largely successful while the combined 3rd / 4th Grade XI were not and the rest of 3s / 4s didn't bother at all.  5s went down in a kind-of-close-but-always-just-behind-the-run-rate rip snorter, which has been in vogue with their moderately miserable season so far.

Of greater signficance, the 2nd Grade boys were placed in charge of an electronic scoreboard and managed to keep themselves entertained.


Well done.

1st Grade:   Lane Cove 8/261  def  NW Sydney 7/185

1s turned up to the greatest ground in the Southern Hemisphere on Saturday morning and were delighted with the ‘Willoughby Road’ that was presented. Skipper lost the toss and le Coves were sent in to have a hit. New boy Jarrod Baker opened up with Gumpy McGump. The X factor contributed highly early doors and with the score on 9 Smithy shouldered arms to a straight one and was back in the sheds. That brought Dami to the crease who looked shaky early on before coming good. Baker gave the Big D.Nash his first Covie pole caught and bowled for 8. Cornie beat Baker back to the sheds after being wrapped on the pads first ball. Tom ‘SuperCoach, King Wes, T.Train, T.Daddy Cool, T.Mac’ McDonald put on a good partnership with Dami before Bobby Geldof decided that he was needed elsewhere and departed for a well made 45. 
At 4/101 the Coves were in a pretty strong position with their best batsman and Gal to come. By his own admission Gal struggled early doors but turned that around to peel off a cracking century. He was also lucky enough to see one of the greatest pull shots in the modern era from Wes. No doubt the cricketing fraternity will talk about this for some time. After a 48 run 9th wicket partnership los Coves finished with a handy 8/261. Gal finished unbeaten on 110 and all the boys would agree it was a great innings to witness.
With the threat of rain on the radar it was important to get through as many overs as possible to make it as hard for the Hurricane(s) under the McDuckworth/Lewis system. Schneaky Poit and the centurion opened up and managed to build enough pressure to have the Canes 1 down when the storm hit. Play was suspended for around an hour and a half and the Coves pushed for victory. With the exception of the 2nd wicket stand, wickets fell at regular intervals and honours were shared amongst the bowlers. The game was brought into disrepute when G.Smith and D.Naughton served up some humble offerings for the Canes.
The Canes ended batted through their allotted 39 overs to be 7/185 (revised target 234). Good performance from the Coves sees them pick up 6 points and remain on top of the table with 3 rounds to go. 
Well done to 2s who notched up a bonus point win at Bruce Purser.
Paul Langtry

Players' Player
3 – Gal

2nd Grade:   Lane Cove 5/65  def  NW Sydney 64  with a bonus point

Second Grade Report – Maximum Points Versus Norwest Sydney In ETag Cup

Nice early start this week, always a pain after a long working week.  Was particularly annoyed while scurrying around to get an urgent report out on Friday afternoon, seeing our rotund skipper consuming 8-10 amber beverages at the CBD Hotel from 4pm.  Frustrating.

Anyway, was retrieved by Doherty and we went out kick-starting the macroeconomy.  Cross City Tunnel, Bridge, Lane Cove Tunnel, M2, M7, M16 Rifle…Mick’s ETag monthly account will have to arrive via a courier in a wheelbarrow. 

Really Good Areas there Camarsh.

Arrived at Rouse Hill with the ground in particularly good order, the drainage was unbelievable.  Farmer turned up with a suit to go to the races, and was clearly blowing up at the prospect of having to play cricket.  Few changes to the squad this week, with the side losing John & Ducky and gaining Frenchy and Big Cox.

The pitch was quite a good one all things considered, but both captains would have no hesitation in bowling should the coin fall their way.  Mantarro called upon all his experience of playing Dice and Coin flips with semi legit Griffith Mobsters to call correctly and we were in the field.

We started ok, but failed to get any real momentum early.  Coves were a little flat and a little low on energy and that showed as the Canies got to 2/43 with a relative minimum of fuss.  Dodds dropped an absolutely appalling catch (sorry Bez) and things just weren’t really happening for us.  We got lucky when their opener played an interesting lap shot off Dodds which was well snaffled by PTBDK – OOTG.

Then things just clicked.  Great spells by Cox, Farmer and Bez and supported by some superb catching from Farmer and Mantarro and all of a sudden we were in the sheds with them all out for 65.  Special mention must go to the skipper, who plucked a gentle Farmer full toss out of the air at short midwicket at full stretch.  Unbelievably, limited seismic activity was recorded in the Rouse Hill area on the Richtor scale when he returned to the turf!

Big Cox – 3
Dodds – 3
Farmer – 2
Bezer – 2


It rained, and a few small contributions got us home 5 down

Finally congratulations to Mick Doherty… who managed to get his first bit of tender loving care since…..

Players' Player
Big Cox – 3
Dodds – 1
Bez – 1
Farmer – 1

Must maintain the momentum versus SD’s in a one dayer at Dubtallon this week.

Ian Phelps
Baby Got Quack

3rd Grade:   Lane Cove 117  def by  NW Sydney 8/118

With 4th Grade washed out on the Friday due to torrential downpour, half of Dempsey's finest were drafted in to 3s to make up the numbers and perhaps benefit a little from a 3rd Grade education.  Introductions took place, first impressions were poor, potential friendships withered and died... standard Lane Cove.  Jack Standing was 3s' unfortunate 4th (or 5th??) skipper for the season and he began his reign in style, losing the toss and being sent in to bat on a hard, grassy wicket.  Ricko and Benny Arnall of ex 1st Grade fame opened up, and looked fairly comfortable after a few overs when I went out to fetch some coffee and a bacon and egg roll for Sharples.  I returned not long thereafter pleased to discover we'd only lost 4 wickets in the hour I'd been gone, with Benny Arnall of ex 1st Grade fame contributing 13 and Kiran casually crafting his way to 11.  Despite all 11 players in the side being able to hold a bat, we couldn't put any significant partnerships together and it was left to Alex Maxwell of ex 1st Grade fame to anchor the innings... an unfamiliar role indeed.  There were plenty of trademark shots from Snacksy on his way to 40, but he was undone in Pieterson-like style by a slow, straight one from a left arm tweaker.  The Coves were all out for 117 in the 40th over, about 150 short of a competitive total and with Craig Robertson of ex 1st Grade fame stranded on 2 not out.  Many bad shots were played, and though I can't speak for the batsmen whose dismissals I didn't see, its probably safe to assume they were ridiculous abominations as well.

The Coves needed to bowl well to be any hope in this one, and with Standing and Craig Robertson of ex 1st Grade fame opening up, we had two likely culprits to do a job.  Start well we did, as Standing, then Robbo, then Standing again hit the woodwork to pin the Canies back at 3/13.  Some counter-attacking play from the NWS #4 got them back on top until the rain delay, Phil Tran and a wobbly slow full toss brought him undone for 26.  Tranny frustrated the NWS' token Pom, teasing him into attempting a filthy hoy towards the short boundary that didn't end well for him.  Wickets were falling, but we were bowling plenty of extras and not building any pressure.  Kiran probably didn't bowl his best but courtesy of a tidy catch at backward square from Maxy and a sharp catch at midwicket by Standing, the Canies were 7/66 and it was advantage Covies.  The lower order knuckled down though, keeping out straight ones as we gave away cheap runs.  Daz Delaney pegsed another one, and at 8/90 it was probably an even money bet.  It was around this time that Sharples dislocated and fractured his finger and the former skip had to go out and field about 8 beers deep.  The injection into the game did not have the desired effect, as we grassed our one presentable chance with 5 runs to defend and they passed us 8 down.  I'm not saying we would have won, but take that catch and I'd fancy our odds of getting the last one cheaply.

Oh well.  In cricket, if you don't bat well, spill chances and give away lots of extras, you'll find it hard to win games.  Somehow we're still 3rd, and there are 3 games left.  Will we still make the 6?  Can we take the heat?  Does anyone care either way?  All excellent questions that will be answered in the coming weeks.  As I don't want this to end on a downer, remember that we need to accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative, latch on to the affirmative and don't mess with Mister In-Between.  The benefits of a short Lane Cove career are many.  Its never too late to quit.


Players' Player
3 - Maximumwell
2 - Kiran
1 - Jack

4th Grade:   Lane Cove  drew  NW Sydney

Sing it with me

5th Grade:   Sky Muppets 4/93  def by  Burwood 198

Sky Muppets take on the Burwood Flyers

Round 18 saw Lane Coves best blokes, but worst cricketers this side of 3rd grade, take on the flying Burwood Briars. The Flyers were having a stellar year in TCCC but I’m sure are having an even better one now that they paddled their way through the water on Sunday to just scrape home against the men from 1893. Master Sinclair took over skippering duties from Master Bates this week and it must have been like playing in a side with the ghosts of Christmas past as both the Schnitz and Club Dub were playing on Sunday.

Turning up to a humid morning saw the Coves have everything prepared and unwrapped by 11:30 – so we sat around and watched the Flyers warm up for the next 35 minutes or so. No need to warm up when you have such abundance of God given talent Schooner thought. Losing the toss, the Flyers strangely decided to bat on a road. A road that saw the first grade game casually knock up over 400 runs on it the day prior......Tough going early doors until Skipper Schooner felt a twinge in his shoulder and decided to change tactics and bring on the destroyer who removed the solid looking opening bat. Big wicket. Then they piled on the runs. Wow. At the beer interval it looked like we’d be chasing 260 but we ended up rolling them for 198 with Keith, The Schkip, Sudsy, The Zeek and Barnesy sharing poles.

So with the schtick in hand, Webby and Barnsey opened up getting us to 0/5 from 5 overs when the thunderbolts and lightning came along (very, very frightening). So off we went, put covers down and stared at our phones. For half an hour, then another half an hour, then another half an hour, then another half an hour, then another half an hour, then another half an hour, then another half an hour. Come 6pm, we finally got back on in a super dooper special Duckworth calculation gave us a revised target of 100 from 20. Pretty fair really, except for the 5 overs we had used. So, 95 from 15 then. Gettable. Kind of.

Webby and Barnsey battled on and put on 72 for the opening stand (Webby put on 41 trying to lift the run rate and Barnsey scored 23) which got us to about the 17th over needing 28. Studdsy and Nev ran at everything until Studdsy gave up his wicket in search of victory which left Nev to face the final 2 balls needing 9 to win. Well, what can we say, the big marn wound up, spanked the leather but got caught on the fence. Sadly, not to be with a little to much left to be done in the last 6 overs.

Not to worry, the Flyers were nice and we, being horrible cricketers, like losing. So out the the old stomping ground at Mona Park next Sunday against Auburn.

Be there!

Mike Raymond
(Still fat)
3 – Webby
2 -  Barnsey
1 - Sudsy

Club Champs - we're coming somewhereth, probably 2nd.  The top four grades are also doing okay.

Training - We're probably going to be off again at North Sydney #2.  Please try and get to the Wednesday night session at the Gartlan Centre at Riverview from 7 pm.

Fantasy League - Boggley Boogs is leading, followed by a lot of people no one likes.  Send me your $20 if you haven't paid or death.