TWIC - Tuck Your Ears In You Mongoose

A reasonable cricketing weekend for the Coves was topped off by an excellent pig session at North Sydney Oval - very fitting then that the Fattest Man at the Coves and the Fattest Man at the Blues managed career best scores on a weekend where piggishness sunk to a grand nadir.  Against the Students Warriors, 1st, 2nd and 3rd Grade all had comfortable victories while 4s went down in the chase and 5s were knocked over by Auburn in Bowl 'Em Catch 'Em cricket.

1st Grade:   Lane Cove 6/209  def  Mac Uni 205 
After a great day 1 against Mac Uni, we needed to go on with the job to make sure we got the six points.  We resumed the day at 1-60, and Smithy got us off to another great start, taking to the Mac Uni bowlers.  Smith made 68. Jack and Gal batted well together ticking the score board over, then we lost Jack and Crazy, Holt and Gal got us back on track.  Gal fell just before lunch for 41, needing ten runs to win after lunch Richo really wanted to get to the Diddy early and hit a four then a six to win the game. Big round this week not only for 1s but for the club, good luck to everyone.


Players' Player

3 - Smith
2 - Bez
1 - Holt

2nd Grade:   Lane Cove 199  def  Mac Uni 102 

Coves Chalk up 6 Despite 2 Team Members Spending Consecutive Saturdays With John Lloyd 
And thus another depressing weekend gone by.  Covers with Mantarro.  Juniors with John.  Covers with John. Coffee With John.  New Zealand Flexi First Four Investing with John. Watching them jump over hedges with John.
Alas the boys were greeted with another magnificent surface for cricket.  Lively in the morning, flat in the afternoon, what else could you want really.  Captain Mantarro impressed the importance of starting well, taking a few poles early, and getting into the girth of Mac Uni’s middle order.
Dodds and a shamelessly inebriated Scarcella opened up with some good pressure early doors and an LBW to Dodds – well supported by a STEAMING spell from Scarcella.  After an excellent run out from Tunners, we were in control at 5 for 40 odd after the first hour. 
Pitch flattened out and we were made to work fairly hard in the afternoon in improving conditions.  A good grinding spell from Farmer and very good afternoon spells from Standing and Scarcella put the result beyond doubt.  Highlight of the afternoon session being Doherty dropping a sitter off Dodds and concussing himself with a head slam.
Ridiculous… Ridiculous Scenes
3 – Crazy Joe Camarsh, 10 am start, loose behaviour, Ice throwing
2 – Dodds. 10am start, did the hard yards when the ball was doing something early, good ranting at Maxwell and Herrick
1 – Richo.  Ensuring I was shoulder charged by 2 groups in the Cricket NSW Blind Race, in my role as a designated boob
Oh Whoops, that was Pig Day Yesterday!
2 – Fish. Important Runs and Quickly
2 – Dodds. 3 poles
1 – Farms, 3 poles, long spell, exposing how full Scarcella was
1 – Scarcella, full.
Big game versus the yardstick of the competition this weekend.

3rd Grade:   Lane Cove 6/272  def  Mac Uni 183 

Despite the rain during the week, the pitch had come up a treat and looked an even better batting deck than the previous day.  Cox and the Fat Shkip resumed at 1/53, and it was eventful bowling early doors as the Fat Shkip was put down twice behind the wicket and Coxy may have been spilled as well.  The ball however only had a few overs of life in it as it was all straight up and down after that with absolutely nothing in the deck for the seamers to work with.  Coxy batted well right up until he bunted one straight to short cover to be gawn for 63 - if you're getting run off your legs by an unfit, fat bastard, you need to take a good long look at yourself Samuel.  2/144 with the weather holding off and the end in sight.  The Fat Shkip cemented his reputation as the fattest of flat track bullies, slogging the Coves past the total with Slats, and then slogging past the 100 mark as well.  Slats departed for 29 with the job done, and Mitch Wright (14), Brad Caddey (4) and Jarrod Rixon (11*) all spent a bit of time in the middle before the pin was pulled at tea.  We ended up 6/272 at the close with the Slogging Skipper dismissed for 144 of the least attractive runs you'll thankfully never see.

Commiserations to the Mac Uni boys who would have been right in it if they'd held a few chances, and cheers for the excellent tea and a game played in great spirit.  Big game for 3s next up as Strathfield look like one of the teams to beat this year.


Players' Player
3 - Fat Shkip
2 - Ricko Jnr
1 - Coxy

4th Grade:   Lane Cove 127  def by  Mac Uni 161 & 2/85

After our usual introductions following the standard 5 or 6 changes to our team we were asked to bowl on an excellent looking deck.
A brand new opening attack of Dwyer and first gamer Sargeant were let loose to cause some damage to the top of order of Mac Uni and that they did. Both were rewarded with early wickets before Sarg pulled up lame and had to be spelled. Micky D continued to get wickets with good stump to stump bowling to have 3 with Scotty chipping in with one of his own. Another to Alex French and we had Mac Uni in trouble 6 down for about 80. As usual with good teams they dug in and scrambled to 161 with Micky D coming back to claim his first 5fa for the club, Dunny snagged a wicket with a very very rusty spell of bowling. Paul Ritchie benefited from a good spell the previous week to bowl 8 accurate overs 1 fa 11. Good catching and fielding to restrict the Uni boys to a gettable score and 28 overs to bat on the first day to make inroads in the run chase.

Must mention Alex French copping a cruel bounce to wear one on the bridge of the nose off a full blooded cut shot. Plenty of blood but he was quickly in good hands as the offending batsman Clyne Fernandes (Mac Uni skip and heart surgeon) stemmed the flow and sent him off for stitches (2 in the end). To Clyne and the Mac Uni guys for assisting and giving us a sub fielder: thank you for the sportsmanship.

Dunny and young Andrew Barnes got us off to a solid stat seeing off 7 or 8 overs before Dunny was trapped in front. Ben Chiarella smashed a great cover drive before his aggression got him nicking one to the keeper. Rafe and Andrew took us to 2 for 49 before Rafe who looked good departed. Andrew who showed the more experienced batsman how to value your wicket, he batted for 50 balls for 14 to do a great openers job, 4 for 55 when his wicket fell. A 20 odd partnership before the skip disgracefully threw away his wicket with 2 overs to spare. We finished 5 for 88 with Paul Ritchie and Dan French at the crease with a very good chance of knocking off the runs even though the top order made the job harder.
Day 2 started with Clyne removing Frenchy's stitches from the previous week before play resumed to keep his rugged good looks intact. Only 74 to get, 5 wickets in the shed on a great deck that was even better than day 1. We were greeted by the news that Mac Uni's 2 opening bowlers were away sick and injured, hope was rising. But quickly hope turned to despair with both Frenchy and Ritchie in the shed with a few overs quickly followed by Dwyer run out and Sargeant LB first ball 9 for 111. Scotty and Alex French tried to rescue things but fell 34 runs short. 
We let a real chance slip in this game with a good team picked but not enough application from the top 7 batsman.
Mac Uni went out to bat  with a first inning lead, we needed quick wickets and proceeded to drop 3 catches to have them 2 fa 85 after 20 overs when by mutual agreement we decided that was enough with the batsman enjoying the good batting conditions. Must mention first Covie wickets to Ben C and Rafe.

Players' Player
3 - Mick Dwyer 5 wickets day 1
2 - Paul Ritchie
1 - Andrew Barnes

5th Grade:   Sky Muppets 175  def by  Auburn

Will keep this brief as I detest playing against Auburn, going to Auburn and losing to Auburn.  Schaafs botched the toss and we were sent in to umpire first, with Webby and Schaafs getting us off a to good start before John fired Schaafs with the score at 36.  Pushy swung many times, connected very few.  Broyd Rage's innings was furious and intense, but his dismissal triggered an impressive collapse with the Muppets losing 4/7 including two shouldered arms pegulations.  Pushy triggered Porky in our second mistaken application of the Laws of Cricket before Matt Varidel and El Blobby Myers steadied the ship somewhat.  Matt either chopped on or stepped on his pegs with the score on 141, bringing the two fattest men at the club together, beginning the game of (fat) cat and (chubby)mouse.  After several attempts to run each other out, Myers eventually succumbed to Fat Man's Cramp, hoying unashamedly at anything within reach and ultimately schnookling one to slip (after missing the previous delivery by the M2 or so)... which was caught.  9 year old Jonty Webb came to the crease for his Covie debut and survived one ball but not two as the bowler decided to bowl full pace (admittedly still slow) and clean him up.  Well done.  All out 175 with overs to spare.

Broydy and Matty V opened up and after a bit of a flurry at the start, Broyd Rage removed the chirpy opener for peanuts.  The run rate was slow for the first 15 or 20 at 3 an over as Matty, Stubert and Husnain hooped / span the ball around, past and under the bat.  Huzzy took a pole with a good catch to Schaafs at cover, but the run rate began to increase as the Auburnonians opened up the shoulders.  As can be the case at times, straight ones sometimes aren't enough, and when you drop quite a few chances as well, it all adds up in the end.  We were made to pay as the opening bat who'd led a charmed life finally found the middle a few times to chalk up 80 odd.  Wickets were lost at intervals at the other end, but we ended up conceding the runs with a few overs to spare with Auburn 6 down.  Matt Varidel was the pick of the bowlers with 0/21 off his 8, and the family Webb were everywhere in the field with both dad and son sliding all over the shop saving runs.


Players' Player
3 - Daryl Webb
2 - Smeagol Myers
1 - Matt Varidel

Fantasy League - Burt Rikehardsson was the big mover courtesy of his ludicrous investment, up to 2nd in the ladder just behind Mike "The Tick" Doherty, still desperately clinging on and sucking all the blood he can.  Cotty's team looks to have plenty of legs in 3rd with Rixon and Daly proving cagey selections indeed (just wait til U24s starts...).  Bez, Naughto and President / new dad Hoody are still in the ballpark.

Training - is on Wednesdays.  Click the link if you don't know the drill, and keep an eye on the website if the weather is poor.

Champagne Moments - The Fat Secretary notched up Covie Century #2, with the best part of 10 years and 50 kgs between the two.  Big Cox and Le Grande Shkip put on 131 for the 2nd wicket, which isn't a record but is a good effort.  Milestones - Gerald Cornelius passed 1,000 runs for the club against Mac Uni on the weekend, well done to the big prowling cat.  Duck Bat - Cotty, Jackson Sargeant and Kenjamin are all on two globes.

Club Champs - sitting pretty well in 2nd after 3 rounds, but the games against Strathfield will be a significant test of how we're progressing this year.